Smoking update

Well its currently two weeks today and boy what a journey!!! At times it feels like losing a limb. At times I would gladly loose a limb just to inhale a dreaded fag. The constant waves of extreme addiction are still very much within me. This journey will be lengthy. But I'm determined - and I've bloody well got to stop - no choice there.

The worst times are when out socialising. Most recent endurance was I actually stood outside in the smoking section at the local pub and just took the scene in - Shaking was I - trying to control the urge of asking a complete stranger for a fag. God - desperation was at the fore. But I resisted!!! And for a very long time I  actually disliked the clinging stench attached to my clothes.

I hate this habit controlling my life - I spend a good many wasted minutes everyday thinking and yearning about this disgusting habit. My family, friends and colleagues have been a comfort and tower of strength to me. I also still very much need the support of Lorraine (my smoking cessation nurse) who provides the fuel injected lecture every time I go. Loved the feeling though when she measured my latest nicotine level and it displayed  a number one - I was ecstatic!!! Just a shame the machine will never display a zero (just being a tadge greedy there for success) as one is the lowest it goes. I now get very excited meeting Lorraine. I thrive off her praise and guidance lapping every well done up.

I know its only 2 weeks and some people will say 'well is that it' but believe you me for such a heavy smoker I feel I've already journeyed half way to base camp.

Will update next week - wish me luck!!!

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